I found this tucked away in my draft folder. Since I got engaged about a month and a half ago and am getting married in less than 5 months, I thought it might be a good idea to revisit it. 🙂 Clearly, I forgot to post it after July 28th. Oops. But funny enough, I’ve been thinking about a lot of these things over the past couple months, and my views are pretty much the same. Also- I’m leaving the last paragraph in there just for kicks and giggles, because SURPRISE I AM ENGAGED NOW. Enjoy.
So I’m writing this blog post to celebrate my one year anniversary with Stephen Joiner. My boyfriend. As I write it, it’s almost been a year and I’m waiting til after July 28th to publish it. (Hopefully we won’t break up in the next 9 days. That would be sad on multiple levels.)
Anyways… the point of this post is that I am super thankful for my Steeben and so glad that God made him such a big part of my life. It takes a really special person to love me, and I am thankful for all of those people in my life. God knew I needed a patient and loving guy and I’m glad that he gave me just the right one.
That’s not actually the entire point of the post. I normally don’t like to ramble about my feelings. But I do like to ramble about things I think about and things I’ve learned. And I also like to write them down so I can hopefully learn from them and others can learn from them, too. So I guess the real point of this blog post is to share something I’ve learned in the past year. I’ve by no means decided that I’m the expert on love. Not at all. It’s just an idea, and I could be wrong. But tell me what you guys think about it.
This sparked from the other night when I had a dream that I was marrying Stephen. Normally that would be cute, right? Well in my dream, I can just vividly remember standing outside the church thinking “Oh my gosh. What am I doing?? Do I know what I’m doing?? What if I make the wrong choice??” I was legitimately a little terrified. I woke up scared and not knowing what to do and scared I could never get married because I’d always be trapped by that question “What if I make the wrong choice?” Then after thinking about it for a while, I kind of decided something.
Maybe it’s true, maybe it’s not. But I don’t think you can make the wrong choice in a marriage. Oh you can make a stupid choice. You can make a choice that makes your life harder than it needs to be. Yeah, you can make a hard choice. But I don’t think you can make a wrong choice on that day. I think you make an easy choice one day, and then every day after that, you decide to love that person. No matter how stupid they can be, no matter how frustrating they are, no matter what. You love them.
I once read somewhere, “Choose your love, then love your choice.”
And I guess that’s the best way to word what I’m saying. Not saying that a person’s decision in a partner for life isn’t a huge decision. Oh it is. It’s very huge and shouldn’t be made lightly. But not for the reason that every fairytale stories tells us… those stories all make us nervous because we’re afraid the princess won’t find her “true love” or her “perfect prince”. We’re worried she’s going to get stuck with the other guy. But maybe it’s not about finding one true love. Maybe it’s about finding the person God has put in your life and you both promising to stick with each other through it all.
So there’s that profound Brittany thought. No worries, guys, I’m not engaged. And it’s not happening anytime soon. Who knows if and when my wedding will be or how much I’ll change before that happens. But I hope I always remember to focus more on commitment than feelings.